There's a gate to hell behind every car wash !

Do you know that weird feeling when you have to leave for a dentist appointment, or have to call somebody you don't really know or like, anxious, unsettled, heart is racing, it pretty much sucks from my point of view because on top of these two I also get it each time I'm heading for a car wash. I like my car clean but if its filthy its fine either way, I'll find an excuse not to wash it, no worries ! My wife she's the one which obliges me to have it properly washed at a car wash, if I ignore her she starts blackmailing me, the 1st stages involve total abstinence from ironing my clothes, but I can manage, she'll stop cooking eventually but my parents, grand parents and in laws live in a 2 km radius from our place so I can successfully manage this as well real problems appear when she stops flushing refuses any form of physical contact and sooner or later I have to give way. "promise I'll take it to the cars wash just stop it !" usually happens in a moment of weakness while in bed ... Next morning I wake up with the sun, usually 4 am I can't sleep anyway, get breakfast, shower, sort out the mess in the house, vacuum clean, dust off the furniture, do my exercises, catch up with some work and its already quarter past 4 the car wash opens at 10 still time for some league of legends and perhaps some TV series (downloaded of course). Finally I arrive at the car wash, park my car in one of the stalls (its a manual car wash, without brushes and stuff) and a dude wearing yellow rubber boots and rubber overall comes over(he looks special, like Adam Sandler in Little Nicky) in a deep and slowly spoken voice, big lips and not many teeth left asks me "heeeeey duuuuude ! what do you want ?" (oh fuck my life what do I want ? world peace, tea with butter crumpets, somebody to love me and I'd fancy to win the lottery ... but how can I tell him that, the next moment his father would pop up with a draft for a "sell your soul to the devil contract") "aaaa I aaa want a wash and interior cleaning sir, thank you, would you like my wallet as well ?" JESUS ! So i'm sitting there while he applies lotions, sprays stuff, lets the stuff get in, then washes it away, sprays foam, takes a brake, applies wax, washes the wax off, eventually he's done. Looks to the right, to the left, under the car, in the yard, looks me in the eyes and makes a sign for me to approach him (oh shoot ! he doesn't like my car I'm screwed ). Went over to him and he asked for my key " me drive I can" (in retard voice), gave him the keys and he pulled the car in another stall for the interior cleaning, about 5 of his colleagues stormed the place 1 tall guy, 2 ridiculously small girls and 2 fat ones, armed with rugs, paper towels, spray cans ... 1st thing they turned my stereo to a full volume on some shitty station. They started working, spitting on the windshield for extra polish, vacuuming, washing the carpets, going through my glove compartment, draining gas, the car was shaking like a samba dancer on acid. Eventually I went in to the cashiers office to pay, behind the thick cloud of smoke sat a blonde bimbo in some pink dress and while chewing on some gum with her mouth open she asked me "what do you have boy ?" told her that I got my car washed and want to pay, gave me some sort of ticket to give it to the workers as proof that I paid and I was free to go. I drove off with shivers down my spine, I'm done with it for at least a few months. Seen a miracle on the news yesterday 1st rain in some poor African country since 1901, guess what those clouds knew I had my car washed they flew over and the next morning my car was full of fallen and wet leaves, dusty and the friendly neighborhood pigeon shat on it to claim his territory. What a sad man I am ! washed my car at hells gates and stole the rain from Africa. I bow before you !

Lost

Been traveling quite a lot in the past few weeks, also had enough time to reflect on some issues and came to a frightening conclusion. I'm somehow lost, not really convinced that what I'm doing is the best thing for me, the people I look up to seem to be a group of selfish characters, its hard for me to entrust them with my future. Its expected from me to run (as an owner) and reform the company I'm currently employed, increase, multiply optimize all sorts of fancy corporate terminology which I hate with all my living soul and my guts get weird rashes while listening to such business babbling. Had a 10 days entrepreneurial workshop (fancy elitist, rediscovering hot water type of nonsense) meant to motivate and increase the business spirit urge ... went through it like a boss no stress at all, I was supposed to identify my weaknesses, what I had to improve, prove to myself that I had the nuts to approach strangers on the street and try to sell them stuff. Frankly I knew long before that I had to work on some things, mostly not being such a lazy prick, lose certain ethics and grab any chance but I also knew I had it in me to approach strangers and sell them things and I can do that easily with great success by profiting from the right social environment and the right type of dudes (I hunt alpha male macho type of douchebags ... weak cunts for me to profit from). This waste of 10 days wasn't necessary to rediscover myself and this is whats really unsettling, people which I let guide me through business value this and somehow they believe that I have to rediscover myself get to know myself better, I already know me well enough to tell you right away that I'm not hyped by the type of business I'm in and thinking seriously on my alternatives. For the moment I'm lost and scared, not sure where to start, not sure what to do, keep going even if I'm not entirely happy with this and eventually dump everything as soon as I figure out something better. I'll be back with a more positive swing sooner or later. Ever wondered how you make one of these ?